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[–]ialdabaoth -2 points-1 points0 points  (3 children)
You don't know if someone has consented. All you know is whether people approve of the interaction, and you only know that after the fact.
The thing that makes a girl incapable of making up her own mind, is the fact that the entire culture is invested in second-guessing her decision in the interest of "protecting" her, because there's a lot of social capital to be gained from doing so (and because more often than not they want their turn with her).
[–]vahavta 4 points5 points6 points  (0 children)
My apologies. I was under the impression this was what you yourself believed, not of how you viewed the societal aspect.
I will say while there has certainly been a particular breed to take that stance, I've always been quite lucky to have fabulous kinksters defend me when others say I can't have possibly consented because I am near ten years younger than my partner, because I'm not allowed to play with others, because of how hard we play, because I don't use a safeword and sometimes don't enjoy what we do despite my explicit and ongoing consent. Sanity does still exist.
[–]Twinkle-Tits 0 points1 point2 points  (1 child)
So reading through all of these comments what you are saying is that despite explicit verbal consent at the time, it is ultimately you and your partner's word on what happened and regardless of the facts, society will decide who is telling the truth and what the consequences will be. (In my view you take that risk every time you interact with someone be it sex, BDSM interactions or even social interaction). Because of the way society views men and women, you think the risk is significantly higher that men will be judged for wrong doing in these scenarios. There's no solution to this, it's just a calculated risk that everyone takes.
[–]ialdabaoth 0 points1 point2 points  (0 children)
Yes, exactly. And there's higher risks to women imparted by this process, too, but those are different risks than the risks imparted to men. (For women, it's mostly the risk that she'll wind up pushed / coerced into a situation that's unhealthy for her, and have nowhere to turn because everyone agrees that "he's such a great guy")
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